The journal of a normal white girl from a conservative Christian family who found herself to be a liberal, vegetarian, tree-hugging, Buddhist in the middle of Nebraska beef country ... and then moved to big, bad Los Angeles to become a Buddhist chaplain much to everyone's consternation, including her own.
WOW, I read all 3 post, breath little sister breath. For me writing is a good thing, even though I tend to tell at least one person what is going on with me if I find myself in inter turmoil, sometimes by writing I discover more that needs to be looked at which in term leads to sitting down and doing some reflecting. I no that I can't let something go if I am still clinging to it or struggling, you said yourself "I guess it’s just time to stop struggling against the struggle". I go back about 18 months ago when I was really struggling against my spirituality, I was fighting against my true calling because I thought I should somehow be able in some form to believe as others around me believed, when I stopped fighting the preceptions and surrendered to my inter most self then I was free but I had to learn this leasson so that I can apply it to other areas in my life when I am ready to give up the struggle. Sometimes I just have to paint my butt into a corner to finally stop fighting and accept things as they are or do the footwork needed to change what I can. Ah politics and the fun of being left leaning in a right leaning state. I just blow it off as much as possible. I am the only liberal in a company of 25 people, a few of my co-workers are Fox news and Limbaugh loyalist. Yeah sometimes I really rip them a new one mentally but more and more I just forget it, I can't change the way they think and they will never change the way I think. The only time I pipe up is when they are repeating lies within a group of people who may be totally uniformed and I do this in a very calm manner just so the uninformed can see the big picture; one of the guys was trying to blame the Great Depression and financial whoas of that time on FDR, so I had to set the record straight plus FDR is one of my heroes and I don't take kindly to people belittling what he did for this country via WPA and other programs, he made a lot of mistakes but the reconstruction programs weren't one of them. My vote may not be the vote the changes the outcome of who wins the senate seat or gets the electorate votes for president but by voting I am voting my conscience, ethics and values and I am canceling out at least 1 vote for the canidate I don't like. I like listening to commentators from the left just because it is about time we started having a voice in the MSM but sometimes they are full of shit too. Happiness is an inside job and it starts with gratude. Man if that ain't a bitch to remember sometimes but we have a degree of awareness that some people don't have so be grateful for that. I am glad you re-awakened your "soon" it wasn't lost your just misplaced it. From what I gather from your writtings you are very busy but what helps me get out of me is doing something for others. Lately I have been going to the mental health hospital twice a week to talk with people who's drinking and drugging have cause them to have a major emotional break downs, they appreciate me showing up and also my friends that show up but what they don't realize is they help us more than we help them. Thanks for sharing and take care Scott
1 comment:
WOW, I read all 3 post, breath little sister breath. For me writing is a good thing, even though I tend to tell at least one person what is going on with me if I find myself in inter turmoil, sometimes by writing I discover more that needs to be looked at which in term leads to sitting down and doing some reflecting. I no that I can't let something go if I am still clinging to it or struggling, you said yourself "I guess it’s just time to stop struggling against the struggle". I go back about 18 months ago when I was really struggling against my spirituality, I was fighting against my true calling because I thought I should somehow be able in some form to believe as others around me believed, when I stopped fighting the preceptions and surrendered to my inter most self then I was free but I had to learn this leasson so that I can apply it to other areas in my life when I am ready to give up the struggle. Sometimes I just have to paint my butt into a corner to finally stop fighting and accept things as they are or do the footwork needed to change what I can.
Ah politics and the fun of being left leaning in a right leaning state. I just blow it off as much as possible. I am the only liberal in a company of 25 people, a few of my co-workers are Fox news and Limbaugh loyalist. Yeah sometimes I really rip them a new one mentally but more and more I just forget it, I can't change the way they think and they will never change the way I think. The only time I pipe up is when they are repeating lies within a group of people who may be totally uniformed and I do this in a very calm manner just so the uninformed can see the big picture; one of the guys was trying to blame the Great Depression and financial whoas of that time on FDR, so I had to set the record straight plus FDR is one of my heroes and I don't take kindly to people belittling what he did for this country via WPA and other programs, he made a lot of mistakes but the reconstruction programs weren't one of them. My vote may not be the vote the changes the outcome of who wins the senate seat or gets the electorate votes for president but by voting I am voting my conscience, ethics and values and I am canceling out at least 1 vote for the canidate I don't like. I like listening to commentators from the left just because it is about time we started having a voice in the MSM but sometimes they are full of shit too.
Happiness is an inside job and it starts with gratude. Man if that ain't a bitch to remember sometimes but we have a degree of awareness that some people don't have so be grateful for that. I am glad you re-awakened your "soon" it wasn't lost your just misplaced it. From what I gather from your writtings you are very busy but what helps me get out of me is doing something for others. Lately I have been going to the mental health hospital twice a week to talk with people who's drinking and drugging have cause them to have a major emotional break downs, they appreciate me showing up and also my friends that show up but what they don't realize is they help us more than we help them.
Thanks for sharing and take care
Scott
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